The Dating Game
by Cybris
Summary: Tamahome, Hotohori, and Tasuki all get stuck on--THE DATING GAME! my first fic, please R&R!
1. Disclaimer

I forgot to put this on chapter one: Disclaimer: I don't own Fushigi Yuugi!!! And I am unfortunately not getting paid for it ( 


	2. haha! suckers!

Nuriko: "Hello, and welcome to- THE DATING GAME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" "I am your host, Nuriko!!!!!!!! Tonight our 3 bachelors are- Tamahome!!!!! Hotohori!!!!! AnNnNnNnDdDdDd *dramatic pause* TASKSI!!!!!!!!!!!" *crowd cheers* And the contestant is, who else but the Priestess of Suzaku herself!!!!!!!! GoOoOoOo Ms.Miaka!!!!!"  
  
Miaka: "Can someone get me some rice balls??? I am totally famished!!!!"  
  
Nuriko: "Imagine that."  
  
Miaka: "Fine, well if no one will get me anything to eat, I guess we better get this show on the road!!!!!!!" "OK, in 40 words of less, Tell me why I should chose you as my date."  
  
Hotohori: "Because I love you very much, Miaka. And because I am the emperor. And because I am absolutely gorgeous!!!!" *pulls out a hand mirror and starts grooming himself.*  
  
Tamahome: "Because I love you more than Hotohori does. And because you have made such an impression on me that I occasionally stop thinking about my financial well being!!!!"  
  
Tasksi: "Why am I even here??? I don't like girls!!!!! And I REALLY don't like Ms.'feed me feed me!!! I am so incapable of doing ANYTHING by myself!!!' GOD!!! What is..." *Sees Nuriko balling her/his fists * "I mean, um, because, ooooohhhhhhhhhhhh. I hate this game!!!!!!..."  
  
Nuriko: "Sorry Task, you have exceeded the word limit.  
  
Miaka: "can some one PLEASE get me some rice balls???" "Well, anyway, next question!!!!!" "Um, briefly describe our first date."  
  
Hotohori: "Well, first we can go and get our nails done, then I will take you riding in my most royal of royal chariots!!!!!!!  
  
Tamahome: "I will take you to the most expensive restaurant buffet (all you can eat!!!) there is anywhere!!!"  
  
Tasksi: "I AM NOT TAKING YOU ANYWHERE!!!! I AM NOT GOING TO WASTE MY TIME OR MONEY!!!!!" *notices Nuriko polishing a very big hatchet.* *then quickly starts thinking about his dream date* "AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!! I mean, um, we could go joy riding on stolen motorcycles??? Uhg. I HATE THIS GAME!!!!"  
  
Miaka: "OMG, I just can't decide!!!!! Um, ah, oh. Einy miny miny moe... OK!!!! Fate has decided that I shall go on a date with- TAMAHOME!!!!!!!!"  
  
Nuriko: "Isn't that sweet!!!!  
  
Hotohori: "WWWWWWWAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH HHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!! HOW COULD YOU MIAKA??? I OFFERED YOU A MANICURE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"  
  
Tasksi: "HAHA, HOTI IS CRYING!!!!!!!!"  
  
Hotohori: "How, *sob* many, *sob* timbes do, I hab to, *wail* tell you to, *sob* not call, me, *sob* Hoti?"  
  
Somewhere Tamahome and Miaka start up a round of, "Tamahome." "Miaka." "Tamahome." "Miaka."  
  
Nuriko: "There, there Hoti, it'll be alright." "Well, I guess that just about wraps up this episode of- THE DATING GAME!!!!!!!! Goodnight folks!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" 


	3. Yay! Go Herrings!

Chichiri: HI!!!!! This is you host, Chichiri no da!!!!!!!!!!!!!! And welcome toOoOoOo- the Dating Game!!!! Today our three bachlorettes are-The priestess of Suzaku, MIAKA YUKI no da!!!!!! The priestess of Seiryu, YUI HONGO no da!!!!!!! And- Suzaku celestial cross-dressing macho-man/woman, NURIKO!!!!! No da!!!! And the contestant is none other than the emperor of Hong-Nan himself, EMPEROR HOTOHORI!!!!!!!! No da!!!  
  
Hotohori: Thank you, thank you!!! OK, now on with the show-OMG I BROKE A NAIL!!!!!!! NoOoOoOoOoOoO...  
  
Nuriko: Oh your majesty!!! Batts his/her eyelashes  
  
Hotohori: I can't believe the public is seeing me in such a state! Quick! Call me manicurist!!!!!!!!!  
  
Miaka: I'm hungry. Can we get this over with?  
  
[Author's note: Miaka sucks no da!]  
  
Yui: Yeah, Hoti, get a grip!!!!  
  
Hotohori is sitting in the corner looking in a distressed manner at his broken nail. Tear Goes slightly cross-eyed.  
  
Audience: starts throwing tomatoes HEY!!! GET A MOVE ON!!! THIS IS BORING.  
  
Pot-bellied man drinking beer: I want my money back!!!  
  
Audience: YEAH!!!  
  
Chichiri: Calm down no da! We're starting no da!!!HOTOHORI!!!  
  
Hoti: despairedDOOOOOM DOOOOM!!!!!!!!!! ALL THERE IS IS BLACKNESS AND DESPAIR!!!! WHAAAAAAAAAA!  
  
Chichiri: Come on no da!!! COME TO THE LIGHT!!!!  
  
Hoti: teary OK, fine. In 40 words or less, tell me why I should choose you as my date.  
  
Nuriko: Oh sire, because I have loved you for a very long time, and because together we could win 'The Most Beautiful Male Couple' award!!!!  
  
Yui: Because Tamahome ran away and denied me of his love...  
  
Tamahome: Duh you obsessive needy freak!!! Miaka: Tamahome!!!  
  
Tamahome: Miaka!!  
  
Miaka: Tamahome!  
  
Tamahome: Miaka!!  
  
Miaka: Tama...  
  
Yui: he hem. Please let me finish my explanation!!! Because Tamahome the very rude and obnoxious idiot ran away and denied me of his love, I figured I could do better and decided to test my feminine wiles on an emperor!!! MUAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHHAHA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  
  
Miaka: But I love Tamahome!!! I...  
  
Ominous Voice of the Author: Miaka, you do not deserve the emperor's love anyway!!! And now I shall smite you wiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiith: A HERING!!!!!  
  
Miaka; NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  
  
Miaka is forcefully beaten to death with a herring that appears to be suspended in mid air.  
  
[Author's note: sucker!!!]  
  
Hotohori: NOOOOO!!! MIAKA!!!  
  
Tamahome: Oh yeah, that's her name!!! That's why I repeat it so much so I won't forget!!!  
  
Miaka is now all drawn in pastels to show she's really dead.  
  
Miaka: Oh, well that was unpleasant.  
  
Chichiri; glancing at audience who are getting restless againUm, sire, could we begin again?  
  
Hotohori: yes, well, quite right, we can't keep our um, lovely, audience waiting. Hehe. OK, now briefly describe our first date.  
  
Nuriko: First we can get a manicure, and a perm, and than we can go gamble!!! Hehe.  
  
Yui: We can kill the rest of the Suzaku warriors, MUAuAUHAHAHAAUHAHA!  
  
Pastel/dead Miaka:FEAST FEAST FEAST!!!!!! FOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOD!!!!!starts drooling FOOD!!! Hey!!!!! Wait!! Can I still eat when I'm dead???? NOOOOOOOOOO!!!!  
  
Chichiri: OK, now it is time for the emperor to choose his date no da!!!  
  
Hotohori: UM, well, since Miaka is dead, which is not generally a good trait in an emperess, and Yui just suggested I kill all my friends, than I guess Nuri will have to be my date.  
  
Nuriko: YAY!!!! Uh huh, uh huh!!!!!! WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOH, GoOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  
  
Chichiri: well, I guess that sums up this episode of, the DATING GAME NO DA!!!!!!!!!! 


End file.
